My Gratitude Challenge

Irecently learned about the #GratitudeChallenge and I eagerly signed up when theinvitation came to my inbox.  What’s notto love about putting some extra energy toward gratitude?  I received the daily email prompts and triedto give some thought to each exercise.  Unfortunately,the timing just wasn’t great.

Iam generally a very sunny, positive person. I am a soldier of God and I am fueled by the Lord.  I give thanks daily for the abundance ofblessings I have received.  I love mylife – I have a wonderful family, great friends, and a career I’m passionateabout.  In recent years, I have foundgratitude to be an essential part of my everyday existence.  But I’ll be honest, some days are harder thanothers and during the time of the #GratitudeChallenge it was particularlytough.

Beingthe parent of a special needs child is no joke. My 9-year old daughter, Emily, has autism and is severely developmentallydelayed.  Her capabilities are aboutthose of a toddler.  Every day is astruggle and things have been difficult lately. The not knowing how she is going to be each day.  The constant repeating of the same phrasesover and over again.  The constant dailycare she requires.  The waking up in themiddle of the night (every night) and coming into our room.  It’s exhausting.  And it is emotionally draining for me.  I am saddened by our situation – she didn’task for this and it’s not her fault.  Ijust wish she could be ‘normal’ and have a typical life like every otherkid.  I wish we could have a normal,typical life. 

Day10 of the #GratitudeChallenge came on a Monday after a particularly challengingweekend.  Emily absolutely hates shoppingand it’s very difficult to take her to stores; however, school was quicklyapproaching, and the child needed new shoes. We knew what we were getting ourselves into.  Needless to say, those two days were horribleand by Monday, I was struggling to find the desire to focus on gratitude. 

Ifound solace in connecting with my #HRTribe and #HRPals on Twitter.  Turns out, some others were also strugglingand that made me feel less alone.  I alsohad a wonderful experience that week with my oldest daughter, Avery – we sawREO Speedwagon at the Ohio State Fair (6 years since the first time we went!)and had a great time.  It helped toremind me that I have so much to be thankful for.  I was able to finish the challenge withgusto. 

There are highs and lows in this parenting journey.  Sometimes I feel guilty during the lows – others have it so much worse than I do, how dare I feel down about my situation?  But I’m human and I know that I need to let myself work through the various emotions.  I pray for strength and peace; while I may not understand the ‘why’ behind this situation, I do know there is a reason and I pray for the courage to carry out this duty to the best of my ability. 

Gratitude is coming much easier this week – school is back in session!!

Avery & I – REO Speedwagon at the Ohio State Fair – 2013 & 2019

Avery – 1st Day of School – August 2019

Emily – 1st Day of School – August 2019